


meaning it, and all the places in between

by nowweareunstoppable



Category: Power Rangers (2017)
Genre: Confessions, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Kim is amazing, Sick Character, Sickfic, Trini's sick, Vomiting, action of vomiting is described so if that makes you uncomfortable do not read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-11
Updated: 2017-08-11
Packaged: 2018-12-13 23:50:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11771037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nowweareunstoppable/pseuds/nowweareunstoppable
Summary: Trini was not fine. As they walked down the hall, leaving a sullen Zack behind, nausea started to roil in her gut. She gritted her teeth and sucked in a deep breath. Pushed it away. She just had to get through this test and then she could skip out and go home. Forty-five minutes. Piece of cake.





	meaning it, and all the places in between

Seeing as her parents were away at the twins’ soccer tournament for the next three days, Trini expected to wake up with a sense of relief. Instead she just felt vaguely achy with a dash of apprehension about her Biology test that morning.

 

After a quick shower she couldn’t seem to get warm so had to throw on one of Jason’s old football hoodies that he’d let her borrow after a cold campfire last week. Sure, Trini had her own sweatshirts, and one of Kim’s leather jackets was draped over her desk chair where the other girl had left it after last night’s late study session, but something about Jason’s comically large monstrosity seemed comforting.

 

Plus, it’d be pretty funny to see the faces of Kim’s ex pack of cheerbitches when they realized she was wearing Jason Scott’s name across her shoulders.

 

Trini plodded downstairs and into the kitchen, ignoring her mom’s brief note about staying out of trouble in favor of stashing the twenty dollar bill she’d left her in her pocket. A bowl of cereal was her usual breakfast of choice but in addition to being abnormally chilled, her stomach was also doing a funky sort of roll and Trini had to force herself into eating one of Matteo’s small granola bars instead. Probably just nerves about the test.

 

She and Kim had been studying all week for it but it was worth a decent chunk of their semester grade and Trini would be lying through her teeth if she said she was confident about her chances.

 

A message chimed on her cell phone and she swiped it open.

 

Kim: _you sure you don’t need a ride? Jason’s picking me up, he’d be happy to come by_

 

Trini typed a quick message back as she swung her backpack onto her shoulders and headed out the door, _nah I’m going to walk its supposed to be a nice day. Thanks though._

 

However, by the time Trini got to school she was somehow both sweating from the exertion and shivering from the same chill that wouldn’t leave her alone. If her stomach had been rolling earlier, it was doing backflips now. Maybe not just nerves then.

 

Trini stood for a second next to the stairs, trying to evaluate just how shitty she felt. But there was really no amount of shitty that was going to get her out of taking this test and there was no way she could afford to take a downgrade on it for missing today and leaving it until Monday.

 

“Stupid useless fucking Ranger powers,” she muttered as she shoved her way through the crowded halls, “Sure, they can heal Zack’s broken wrist in three days but god forbid-”

 

“Talking to yourself again, Crazy Girl? Better be careful or other people are going to start calling you that too,” Zack interrupted, looming over her in his trademark dark t-shirt and jeans.

 

“Go to hell,” she shot back as she rummaged through her locker for her water bottle. Kim’s stuff was still taking up half of the space and it looked even more like a war zone than Jason’s, and that was saying something. Just last week Billy found an orange in there behind his books that’d turned a startlingly beautiful shade of green.

 

Zack put on a fake expression of offense, “Wow, and here I expected at least a little bit of praise for actually showing up on time.”

 

Trini didn’t bother replying and it must have struck Zack as odd because he leaned into her space again, “You okay? You look a little pale. And sweaty.”

 

“You really know how to talk to a girl, don’t you? I’m fine.”

 

Before he could reply, Kim slid in between them to grab her textbook out of Trini’s locker.

 

“What’s up my dudes- oh hey are you okay Trini? You look… sweaty.”

 

“That’s what I said and I almost got my head bitten off,” Zack sulked.

 

“Jesus you guys, I said I’m fine. Let’s go Kim, we can’t be late for this test.”

 

Trini was not fine. As they walked down the hall, leaving a sullen Zack behind, nausea started to roil in her gut. She gritted her teeth and sucked in a deep breath. Pushed it away. She just had to get through this test and then she could skip out and go home. Forty-five minutes. Piece of cake. Oh god, not cake-even thinking about food made her stomach lurch. She really shouldn’t have eaten that granola bar.

 

“Trini, you’re shivering.” Kim eyed her warily, trying to walk the line between concern and avoiding getting snapped at again. But Trini was too busy attempting not to barf to try and soothe Kim’s worries so she just walked past her into the classroom to sit at her desk and ignored the worried glances the other girl kept shooting over her shoulder.

 

Their teacher walked into the room with a stack of papers in her hands. “Alright everyone, take your seats and put away your notes. You have the entirety of the period to complete your exam. If I catch any wandering eyes, you will get a zero. No negotiations.” Ms. Chang clapped her hands once in a way that reminded her of Billy and started passing out the tests.

 

Trini got through the first page, blowing through answers as fast as she could, but by the second she was fighting hard to swallow down the nausea. Her fingers were shaking so bad it was nearly impossible to try and write the short answer questions and by the last page her mouth was filling with the telltale saliva that meant she needed to leave- now.

 

The final essay question was only half done but Trini was beyond caring. She shot to her feet and threw her test in the general direction of Ms. Chang’s desk before bolting out of the room.

 

Her sneakers squeaked against the tiles as she ran into the bathroom. Thankfully none of the stalls were occupied so she slid into one on her knees, barely managing to grasp the toilet lid with one hand before she was vomiting hard into the bowl.

 

She gagged over and over again, unable to breathe but unable to quit either. When her stomach finally stopped clenching for a second Trini choked in a desperate, ragged breath. However, the sour taste in her mouth made her gag and she lurched forward all over again to spew even more of her stomach contents into the toilet.

 

The sound of the bathroom door opening registered vaguely in Trini’s mind but she was too busy trying to keep her weak grip on the toilet and not fall face first into her own mess to care.

 

“I knew you weren’t okay,” a voice said softly from behind her, and then there were long fingers pulling her hair back and knotting it into a quick ponytail. Kim knelt down behind Trini and looped an arm around her chest to help her quivering arms in their valiant but failing effort to support her weight.

 

Trini wanted to turn and plead with her to leave; she didn’t want Kim seeing any of this but all she could do was hover over the toilet, spitting and swallowing hard, trying not to throw up again.

 

Kim held her up for a few more moments before asking, “You good? Can we sit back?”

 

Trini nodded weakly and let Kim pull her down to lean against the side of the stall.

 

“Sorry,” she said hoarsely, her throat burning from the acid.

 

“Please tell me you’re not ridiculous enough to apologize for getting sick,” Kim started but Trini shook her head.

 

“For making you miss the rest of the test. You should go back; Ms. Chang would probably understand.”

 

Kim waved away her concern, “Nah, I was just about done and I didn’t know the answer to that last essay anyway.” Trini knew she was lying; they’d gone over lysosomes like four times last night, but she didn’t have the energy to call her on it.

 

“Here drink some water,” Kim offered her a water bottle, Trini’s own, and she realized that Kim had grabbed both their backpacks out of the classroom before she left. She shook her head, pretty sure that swallowing anything would just result in a revisit to the toilet.

 

“Just swish your mouth, it’ll make you feel better, I promise,” Kim pushed it into her hands and Trini complied. Kim was right, of course. The taste being mostly banished made her feel marginally less like she wanted to die.

 

“Can your mom come pick you up?” Kim asked.

 

Trini shook her head, “She and Dad are at the twin’s games in Portown this weekend. I’m fine. I’ll just go to the nurse’s office.”

 

“Yeah, and then what? And stop saying you’re fine. I’ll text Jason. He’ll let me drive the truck back to your house.”

 

“Kim, you seriously don’t have to miss school for me,” Trini protested.

 

Kim leaned forward and took Trini’s face between her hands, “Trini, listen to me. I fucking hate this place. I would love nothing more than to skip and take you home,” then she grinned and flipped her hair, “Plus, you don’t have a choice. I’ll carry you if I have to.”

 

Trini managed to roll her eyes, “I’ll barf on you.”

 

“You would never,” Kim murmured absentmindedly as she tapped at her phone, presumably texting Jason, which was confirmed when she said “Alright, Jace is coming. I’m going to have Billy go sign us out in the office; the secretaries love him so we should be good to go.”

 

Trini let her head loll back in submission against the probably not sanitary stall wall, recognizing that fighting any of this would be like trying to stop a Zord with her bare hands, “Make sure he knows it’s fine to wait until first period is over, I don’t want him to stress about leaving class early.”

 

They sat in silence for a few minutes while Trini breathed through her nose and tried to decide if she was going to throw up again or if she could hold on until she was in her own house. Kim busied herself by brushing a sweaty lock of hair behind Trini’s ear and then in a passable hovering impersonation of her mother, started rolling up the cuffs on Jason’s sweater so that Trini’s hands weren’t tangled in the too-long sleeves.

 

“Kim…”

 

Kim’s hands stilled as she caught herself and she chuckled self consciously, “Sorry. I just don’t know what to do; I don’t know how to make you feel better.”

 

Trini shrugged, “I’m probably just going to have to be sick for awhile. Hopefully it’s a 24 hour thing. You don’t seem inclined to believe me, but I’m not actually dying.”

 

Trini didn’t know what Kim would have replied to that because all of a sudden there was a knock on the bathroom door, and then Jason’s voice called out, “Uh, Trini? Kim? You guys in here?”

 

“No, we’ve moved in the last thirty seconds since I last texted you,” Kim called back wryly as she climbed to her feet. She hefted both of their backpacks onto her shoulders and offered Trini a hand up. Trini hesitated and eyed the toilet. She knew she was going to throw up again; her stomach was already churning but she just didn’t know when. The loss of control was the absolute worst part about being sick and Trini hated it.

 

Kim picked up on her hesitation and crouched back down, “Are you going to be sick again? Should we wait a few minutes?”

 

Trini closed her eyes for a second and then said, “No, let’s go. I’ll be okay until we get to my house.” She hoped. The humming of the fluorescent lights buried deeper into her skull with every throb of her pulse and she really wanted to get up off of the grimy bathroom tiles.

 

She offered her hands to Kim and was slowly tugged onto her feet. Tiny spots flickered around the edges of her vison and Trini tensed as she attempted to fight off the dizziness.

 

“Woah, you got her?” A distinctly not-girl voice said in her ear and she forced her eyes open (when had she even closed them?) to see Jason flanking her left shoulder. She felt Kim’s arm wrapped around her right side.

 

“Girls’ bathroom, not for you,” Trini muttered and weakly attempted to prod Jason towards the door.

 

Jason somehow managed to withstand her mighty barrage and took her elbow instead.

 

“Well I’m not about to just stand outside when you need me,” Jason said. Kim scowled at him from Trini’s other side as they slowly walked out of the bathroom, “I had her, she was fine.”

 

Jason held up his free hand to placate her, “I’m not doubting your abilities Kim, I was just worried. I’ve never seen her like this.”

 

“Just sick, not deaf,” Trini said, tugging her elbow away from Jason to wave at both of them, “Definitely standing right here.”

 

They huffed at her with twin representations of fond annoyance and Trini found herself offering up a small smile in response, despite the ever-present chills and unsteadiness snaking down her spine.

 

“Aright,” Jason conceded. He offered up the keys to his truck and Kim slid them into her pocket. Jason gently untangled himself from Trini’s side and Kim pressed closer to her in response, winding a lean, steadying arm around her waist.

 

“Just leave the keys under the visor; Zack wanted to play some pickup ball after school so I don’t know when I’ll be by to pick it up. Oh, and Trini? Nice sweatshirt,” he winked at her and she saw flash of the old Jason, one who could bring a stadium to its feet with a well timed pass and a smile.

 

“Thanks, Red,” Kim answered for both of them, and if Trini hadn’t had it drilled into her head a hundred times by the other girl that she and Jason were purely platonic, she would have felt a flash of jealousy at the warmth in Kim’s smile.

 

As they made their way through the halls and out into the parking lot, Trini reflected on the peculiar bonds between her teammates. Abnormal in the sense that they sprang out of nothing between strangers in a manner of days, and yet somehow became the strongest ties Trini had ever felt.

 

There was no explanation for the way that Kim and Jason were suddenly a seamless force, despite having orbited around the same social circles for years without ever previously interacting. There was no reason for Billy and Zack being able to read each other so well that they were able to throw quips or hand signals or song lyrics back and forth until they were both in tears from laugher when they’d never said a single word to each other in all their past seasons spent living in Angel Grove. And there was absolutely no sense in these four wonderful, impulsive, hilarious, annoying people choosing Trini to be a part of it. Yet… they did. Here they were.

 

Trini went to bed every night clutching her coin so tight that it bit lines into the pads of her fingers, praying to gods she didn’t truly believe in that this never got taken away from her. She didn’t know how her days had passed before them, but she knew that going back wasn’t an option.

 

“ _Trini._ ” The way Kim stressed her name made it evident that it wasn’t the first time she’d said it.

 

“Sorry?”

 

“I said I’ll help you up,” Kim nodded at the open passenger door and gestured again for Trini to climb into the cab.

 

Trini wanted to shrug off Kim’s hand and insist that she was perfectly capable of getting into a car on her own, and that all this coddling was sort of embarrassing, because it _was_ , but on the other hand she honestly felt like something Goldar had chewed up, tried to swallow, then choked on and coughed back up, and the parking lot was sort of wavering and honestly, how was it possible to feel so cold and so sweaty at the same time?

 

“Do you need me to lift you up?” She apparently still hadn’t moved and Kim was looking at her like she was delirious, “Trini if you’re not going to get in can you at least say something? You’re starting to freak me out.”

 

“I… do not feel well.” Trini finally admitted.

 

“Yes, I’m aware.” Kim rolled her eyes and nudged at her until she finally made the painstaking climb up into the truck (why any vehicle needed to be so unnecessarily high up Trini would never know).

 

Jason’s truck must not have forgiven him for nearly destroying it because it lurched and heaved like a sentient beast as they made their slow process towards Trini’s house. Or maybe it was driving just fine at a completely normal pace and just felt awful because Trini was preoccupied fighting every single second not to lose it all over the dashboard.

 

Kim kept shooting her glances out of the corner of her eye. “Let me know if you need me to pull over,” she offered but Trini shook her head. “I’m good.”

 

However, only two blocks away from her house Trini’s stomach gave a rolling, sickening lurch and she stiffened. Her fingers tightened over the shoulder strap of her seatbelt and even though opening her mouth at this point seemed like it would be a messy surrender, she managed to get out a strained, “Kim _._ ”

 

The tone of her voice must have been telling enough because Kim wasted no time in yanking the truck towards the curb. Trini’s hands fumbled with the buckle and she had to throw her shoulder into the dented door to get it to open. In her haste to get her head outside the truck Trini’s momentum would have had her falling the rest of the way out if Kim hadn’t made a diving grab for the back of her hoodie.

 

Vomit was already coursing up her throat and she barely missed hitting the running board as it finally overflowed. As Kim swore and fumbled with her own seatbelt, the fingers on her other hand tightened their hold on Trini in an effort to keep her inside the cab. For her part, Trini did nothing but retch into the gutter, her stomach somehow finding more to spew up even after it seemed impossible that she had anything left.

 

During a pause in the spasms of her muscles Trini gasped in a much needed breath and realized that Kim had crawled halfway over the middle console in order to wrap her other arm around Trini’s waist, reminiscent of their earlier position in the school bathroom. While she was very grateful for Kim keeping her from smashing her face on the concrete, embarrassment overshadowed any thanks she should have given.

 

Trini was even more mortified to feel tears building up behind her eyelids. She clenched them shut and willed herself to calm down but she felt so sick and to have Kim of all people seeing her like this was… unpleasant. Everything was too hot and sticky and Trini had to force herself to breathe slowly and actually listen to what Kim was murmuring into her shoulder blades, a refrain of “You’re okay, I’ve got you. You’re fine, I promise.”

 

Trini wanted nothing more than to push her away so she could jump out and sprint away from this situation, but in the time it took her to imagine the scenario she realized that Kim was the only thing not shitty in a profoundly shit filled morning and she actually had no desire to run away from her.

 

Plus, running was a complete physical impossibility at this point. She couldn’t even drag herself back into the truck; Kim had to do it for her. Trini let her head loll back against the headrest as Kim fluttered around her, trying to find her water bottle again.

 

“Here just-”

 

“Just swish, I know,” Trini wearily interrupted. She blindly held out her hand and felt Kim press the bottle into her palm.

 

After she was done, Trini realized that she might have come off rude so she forced her eyes open and rolled her head to look over at Kim so she could offer up, “You’re pretty good with vomiting people.” Smooth, not her best work but it was all she could do at the moment.

 

Kim sat back in her seat and gave a wry smile that let Trini now that she hadn’t taken offense earlier and was amused instead of weirded out by Trini’s latest comment. “I’ve held back the hair of a lot of drunk cheerleaders in my time. I have also occasionally been the drunk cheerleader.”

 

This unexpectedly made Trini laugh and she winced as it grated on her sore throat.

 

Kim squeezed her hand sympathetically and said, “Come on, we’re almost there.”

 

Trini wanted to reply, wanted to say something about how thankful she was, but her mind was starting to feel fuzzy and the feeling of uncomfortable vulnerability was too close. Too present, like it was pushed up against her back, leaning over her shoulder.

 

She didn’t quite remember the steps from her driveway into her house. When she snapped back into focus, she was sitting on the couch and Kim was slipping off her scuffed up converse.

 

“I can do it,” Trini mumbled but made no move to actually do anything at all. The walls were tilting a little bit, not spinning exactly but sort of wiggling like a funhouse mirror. Kim finished with her shoes and laid a hand across Trini’s forehead. Her skin was dry and cool and Trini must have been sicker than she thought because she couldn’t bring herself to care all that much about the wanting little whine that slipped out as she nestled into the touch.

 

“I mean, you’re definitely warm. I don’t know, do you have a thermometer anywhere? Or medicine?” Kim had a little line between her eyebrows that tended to mean she wasn’t quite sure what to do next and wasn’t happy about her lack of a plan. For her part, Trini just blinked up at her. Her will to try and appear normal in order to not worry her friends had apparently been left at the doorstep.

 

Kim sighed. “Alright, I know you’re tired so let’s get you to bed and we can regroup when you wake up.”

 

“No,” Trini said.

 

“No? No what?” Kim’s face was torn between amusement and frustration and she quirked an eyebrow at Trini in a way that made her feel like a petulant little kid. “No,” she confirmed, petulance be damned. Kim still didn’t look entirely like she wasn’t about to pick Trini up and carry her upstairs against her will so Trini burrowed herself down into the couch cushions and scowled up at her, daring.

 

Kim held up her hands in surrender, “Okay fine, you can stay down here. I don’t know why the couch is better than your nice soft bed but whatever. Can I at least get you some sweatpants?”

 

Jeans were not ideal, that much was true. Trini plucked at her waistband for a moment and then gave a reluctant little nod. Kim padded up the stairs and Trini took some time to evaluate whether her body would rather pass out or throw up again. She wasn’t 100% sold on either option by the time Kim came back. The sight of her friend, hair slightly messier than usual with a slouchy white t-shirt and her short jean shorts made Trini’s stomach flutter with something other than nausea for the first time all day.

 

She reached out her hands, feeling all at once miserable and sick again, and needing something. She wasn’t sure what, but she just needed it and the feeling of impending tears started to make a reappearance. At this, Kim looked rather alarmed and she immediately stepped forward so Trini could clutch the hem of her shirt in her fingers. The fabric was soft and quelled her upset, at least for a moment.

 

Kim came in closer, standing so that Trini could drop her forehead against her abdomen. Kim’s hand automatically settled around the back of her head and Trini sucked in a deep, shuddering breath.

 

“Oh Trini, you really aren’t feeling well, are you?” Kim said. They stayed like that, Trini on the couch and Kim standing in front of her, pressed together for a while until Trini felt less like a precarious jumble and more like a solid person again.

 

Kim pulled back and knelt in front of her. She started to unbutton Trini’s jeans but then abruptly stopped, and was she blushing? Trini honestly didn’t think she could trust her perception so she just patiently waited for Kim to find her words. “Uh-um is this okay? Sweatpants,” Kim stuttered.

 

Trini nodded, seemingly unable to feel anything anymore except wretched and pukey. Whatever, it was better than the cloying embarrassment. Maybe.

 

Trini stretched up to tug the thick quilt from where it was draped over the back of the couch as Kim fumbled with her pants. She busied herself wrapping it around her and pulling the hood of Jason’s sweater up. She was still cold, but as Kim finally stripped her jeans off the fresh air felt good against her skin. When Kim tried to put her sweatpants on Trini pushed at her with a socked foot.

 

“No.”

 

“What do you mean no?” Kim asked as she sat back on her haunches in exasperation.

 

Trini didn’t feel much like saying anything else, her eyelids were starting to droop and the sleepiness was outweighing the nausea still swirling in the pit of her stomach.

 

Kim rolled her eyes, but there was a fondness there. “Fine. Let me know if you get cold, though. Also, when did you start wearing boxers?”

 

Trini plucked at them; they were obnoxiously yellow with a thick white waistband and she absolutely loved them. “Zack.”

 

They’d gone to the mall last week to get his mom new socks and he’d caught Trini eyeing the men’s section. In typical Zack fashion, he immediately dragged her over and bombarded her with enthusiasm and annoying jokes until she finally felt comfortable enough picking out a pair. Later that night when she was home, she looked at herself in the mirror and admired the way the boxers changed the lines of her body into something that felt… better somehow.

 

Kim looked flushed again and Trini made a note to ask her after she woke up if she was feeling sick too.

 

\------------------

 

After Trini fell asleep Kim wondered if she should have tried to force some ibuprofen into her to reduce her fever, or at least some more water. She’d gotten her to take a few sips but considering how much she’d been puking she was probably dehydrated.

 

The other girl was being almost comically combative though, and Kim was finding it hard not to coo over how utterly adorable she looked, half wrapped in a blanket cocoon and half bare legged, sprawled out on the couch saying nothing but ‘no’ and scowling up at her with that _look_. Quintessential Trini, surly and stoic and just so fucking endearing. It was a lot to handle. And Kim wasn’t even going to get into the boxer thing. Jesus.

 

Kim had been dodging this whole situation for weeks now. She was avoiding even having the conversation with herself _in her own head_ and it was getting to be a problem, but Trini was sick so Kim felt justified in shoving it away for another day.

 

Being needed felt good. Before the Rangers and the coins and the boys and Trini, every action had weight, every deed a cost. Kindness was measured out and traded, not freely given. Need was seen as a weakness to be exploited and Kim was still getting used the simplicity of her new relationships. A hug from Zack was just a hug because he felt like it; it wasn’t for show or to announce a new alliance to the rest of the student hierarchy. When Billy gave her half of his cookie at lunch he didn’t expect anything in return. It was unfamiliar, but Kim found herself reveling in it.

 

She made sure Trini was sleeping soundly before going back out to the truck and grabbing their backpacks. Before she sat back down she rummaged around in the kitchen and found an old mop bucket under the sink, just in case.

 

Trini slept while Kim spread out her homework on the wooden floorboards in front of the couch. The high afternoon sun filtered through the leaves of the tree in the front yard and made shadows that shifted in gold patterns across the room. She should probably have gone back to school but, ew. Plus, leaving Trini while she was in this state was out of the question.

 

It turned out to be a good decision because after an hour Trini’s breaths started to come faster and Kim could see her muscles begin to tense. Kim was just barely able to scramble up and grab the bucket before the other girl was wrenching herself out of sleep and heaving over the edge of the couch. It was only Ranger speed that shoved the bucket under her face fast enough to save the floorboards.

 

It was obvious there was nothing but water and bile left in her stomach but she just kept gagging and gagging and all Kim could do was hold the bucket and clasp her shoulder, tight and steadying.

 

“Try to calm down Trini, I’m right here. Just breathe,” Kim pleaded. Trini was finally able to suck in a ragged breath and when she picked her head up she was obviously disoriented, but from sleep or fever Kim didn’t know.

 

“Mom?” Trini asked, and her voice was so small it made Kim’s heart lurch.

 

Kim pushed a few stray hairs that’d escaped her ponytail back behind her ear and answered, “No, it’s just me. Your mom is away this weekend, remember?”

 

Kim expected Trini to frown or blink up at her like before. What she did not expect was for Trini to start crying. Kim’s eyes widened and she found herself frozen with one hand stilled on Trini’s shoulder and the bucket clenched in the other.

 

Trini looked up at her, bottom lip quivering and tears slipping down her cheeks and Kim felt utterly helpless.

 

“Oh Trini, please don’t. You’re okay-please,” Kim stuttered out.

 

Trini just kept crying and Kim swiftly climbed to her feet. She gently pushed Trini back into the couch cushions and told her, “Wait here, just one second I promise,” and ducked into the kitchen to rinse the bucket. She came back with a few pills and a glass of water and Trini swallowed them down with only a tiny hiccup of protest.

 

She reached out a hand and knotted her fingers in Kim’s shirt again. Kim couldn’t think of anything to do but climb onto the couch and slot her body in behind her. Trini turned so her face was buried in Kim’s neck and shivered until Kim leaned down and tugged the blanket back up over them.

 

Kim tangled her feet with Trini’s and tried to be as solid as she could. She pressed her fingers against the nape of Trini’s neck and stroked the soft baby hairs there, the ones that wouldn’t fit into her ponytail. Trini never sobbed but her silent tears wet the collar of Kim’s shirt and she could feel her little hitching breathes against her ribcage.

 

Eventually, weeping faded back into sleep and Kim didn’t realize that she was following suit until she was being woken up by Trini nuzzling into the hollow beneath her jawbone. Kim blinked herself into wakefulness and saw that the sun was now slung low and burning orange through the window.

 

“Wha-? Are you okay?” Kim started to push herself up onto one elbow, ready to reach for the bucket again but Trini stopped her.

 

“I’m okay. I feel a little better actually,” Her voice was hoarse but there was a level of awareness there that hadn’t been there earlier. Kim pushed the blanket off of them and the air of the room felt good on her sticky skin. Trini’s fever must have broken.

 

A sigh of relief echoed in her chest and she relaxed down again. She tugged Trini back against her chest without even thinking about it, but before she could panic about her mistake the other girl just relaxed into her.

 

They laid still together for a few minutes but Kim could feel Trini working herself up to say something. She was squirming, but Kim knew that pushing her wouldn’t yield any results so she just stayed quiet until the other girl was ready.

 

“Why are you doing all of this for me?”

 

“Mm?” Kim hummed, still sleepy and enchanted by the warmth of the room, and her tongue was too loose and she had no intention of saying it but by the time she realized it was already out, “Why wouldn’t I? I really like you so-”

 

If Kim hadn’t gone rigid as soon as the words left her mouth, Trini might have just shrugged it off as a friendly statement. But her muscles betrayed her and the way Kim froze up probably made it obvious that she had not entirely _meant_ to say that, and logically why wouldn’t she want to say that she liked Trini? Trini knew Kim liked her, they were pretty much best friends, it wasn’t a secret. Unless Kim made it weird like she was doing now, revealing that it _was_ in fact a secret, and Kim wasn’t talking about friend like. Which would mean she was talking about _like like_ … aaand now the pause had gone on way too long to be played off.

 

Trini pushed herself up on her forearms so she was hovering over her. Her expression was guarded but there was an edge of rawness to it that sent Kim’s heart sprawling.

 

“Kim.”

 

Now it was Kim’s turn to blink silently up at her. Even if she had any notion of what to say, she didn’t trust her mouth to not utterly betray her again.

 

“Kim, you can’t say that and not mean it. I can’t… you have to mean it.” Trini’s eyes were so bright that Kim felt paralyzed. The room had gone from the heavy-eyed contentment, dappled gold and dust motes, into something rigid and charged from just a momentary slip of her tongue. Kim wasn’t the one who was sick but she felt fever burning under her skin.

 

Trini waited but Kim’s silence and heaving chest made her face fall and she pushed herself off and away from her, curling into the opposite arm of the couch. Kim followed her, like there was a string tied tight around her sternum pulling her in Trini’s wake.

 

“I mean it,” the words fall heavy from her tongue, deliberate this time. “I-I just, I haven’t had time to figure out what it means, for me I mean- or for us-” Kim broke off, frustrated, and ran a harried hand through her hair. She felt it tuft up in odd angles but didn’t move again to smooth it down. She was ruining this. She hadn’t been ready and now it was blowing up in her face, just like everything in her life tended to do.

 

Kim squeezed her eyes shut and tried to battle the urge to take it all back, explain it away as a fluke. She wouldn’t do that to Trini, at least. But, as she was sinking into herself, she felt Trini’s palm slide against her cheek. When Kim opened her eyes, Trini was right there.

“No rush,” Trini whispered and Kim’s heart felt like it was just quivering instead of beating like it was supposed to.

 

“Trini…”

 

Always ready to turn Kim’s expectations on their head, Trini suddenly smiled. Not a full one, just a slight uptick of her lips; a smile that held something that looked a lot like promise.

 

“We’ve got time. I’m not going anywhere. You’re not going anywhere. As long as you-”

 

Kim knew what she was going to say and broke in, “I meant it. I just want to make sure I’m ready. I want to be fully,” she searched for the right word, “here.”

 

Trini’s hand was still pressed against the jut of her cheekbone, but now it slid down so she was cupping Kim’s jaw. Kim couldn’t help but look at her lips, so full of want she didn’t know what to do with herself. Trini’s skin was too pale and spots of fever heat still burned in her cheeks. Her hair was sweat mussed and her borrowed hoodie was rumbled. She was goddamned beautiful and Kim knew without a doubt that she meant it. Of course she did. There was literally no other way around it; all paths lead back to here.

 

\----------------

 

Exactly two weeks and three days later, Kim walked Trini home and kissed her underneath the streetlamp at the end of her driveway. The pavement was still warm from the sun’s touch and when Trini tucked her hand around the back of Kim’s neck she felt more full than she ever could have imagined. She was present and here and ready and Trini was licking into her mouth and all Kim could do was pull her in closer, hipbones slotting against hipbones under the yellow haloed light.

**Author's Note:**

> I promise an update for the Pacific Rim AU next, I just had to get this one out of my brain. Comments make me write faster ;) ;)


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